Deborah Lipp

…which is not today. Today is like, Day Six. But anyway.

I arrive promptly at 9 a.m., because, y’know, new job. And no one is there. So I loiter outside the office for about 10 minutes until Kevin arrives and unlocks. Unfortunately, the woman who I share an office with is not yet in, so even though I am now inside the office, I am locked out of my office. While loitering in the hall, Kevin and I have a productive conversation/meeting. But still.

The office manager comes in at 10 every day. When she arrives, she tells us my office mate is sick with flu-like symptoms. Oy vey. She also gives me a set of keys.

Lunchtime rolls around and I have brought a lunch, so I prepare it and put it in the microwave and…the microwave is broken.

So I decide to explore the neighborhood and find someplace to buy lunch. Which is when I get in my car and discover the battery is dead.

Because the car is 4 years old and has the original battery, I am concerned that this may be an actual deceased battery, rather than just needing a jump, so I call a tow guy and they tell me one hour. So I buy a sandwich from the guy in the building and go back to my desk, and phone the tow people after an hour and fifteen to find out where they are. Twenty minutes, they tell me.

An hour and a half later, they arrive. By the time my motor is actually running, it’s four o’clock, and the guy advises me to keep the engine running and to bring it in somewhere to have the battery tested. So I phone upstairs to tell them I’m leaving and drive straight to Sears.

The guy who is testing my battery tells me that my tires look bald. Then the woman with the paperwork tells me my tires look bald. Then the service guy across the room shouts at the woman to check my tires because they look bald.

A new battery and four new tires later, I drive away.

Fortunately, subsequent days have been somewhat less eventful. But the microwave is still broken.