Guess who got a job?

So, this is great news for me, and also kind of an interesting moment for introspection.

At my last job, where I was for five years, I was experiencing a lot of boredom and restlessness. The work seemed flat. In part, this was because the work was flat; I was thwarted in my every effort to grow my job. Team leaders were happy with the way I expanded my value to them, then upper management swooped in and said, hold it sister, go back and sit in your corner.

At the same time, the flatness was spilling into my personal life. For the first time in many, many years, I paid some bills late because I just couldn’t be bothered opening them. My household chores, bill-paying to floor-washing, were puddling around my ankles, undone.

Since I was laid off a month ago, I’ve been much more interested in work. And not in a grass-is-greener way; I’ve been excited about the things I can write, and I’ve gotten a lot more personal writing done (although, mea culpa, not on this blog). I’ve been very energized and task-focused, so that things like updating my resume and following up on leads have been fun to accomplish. I feel like I’ve snapped that feeling of ennui, like I’ve had a profound wake-up call.

Yet there is still a kind of ankle puddle in the house. Damn that floor!

So the question is, after a month at home, how much of this transition has been transformational, and how much will the new job be performed by the same old Deborah?

I really don’t know.

3 comments

  1. Tracy says:

    I’ve been thinking about your leaving your old job and the prospect of beginning anew.

    The impression I’ve been getting has been that it was a necessary change. The Universe just likes to “swoop in” and make it for us so that the puddling never gets a chance to become a river.

    Some of us would like to keep the “same old Deborah”.

  2. Roberta Lipp says:

    You never do know that. But I’m really glad you’re out of there, and hopefully faced with actual, y’know, opportunity.

  3. Pax says:

    New job, new environment, new co-workers, new challenges, newer Deborah….

    Changes bring with them the opportunity for growth and learning so even if you start things at work as the same old Deborah you won’t necessarily remain her.

    Nor do I think folks need to be too worried about a new Deborah… you strike me as a lady who has worked through a good sized chunk of whatever BS you started with and have a genuine grounding in humor and wisdom!

    I envy you your new beginning!

    Peace,
    Pax