Femme socks

At this moment I am wearing black lace “trouser socks.” Trouser socks are a weird hybrid animal that sorta resemble socks and sorta resemble “knee-his,” which are themselves a hybrid of stockings and socks. There is more cross-fertilization among women’s hosiery than in the American Kennel Association.

I have to wear femme socks. If I wear plain black socks, they end up in Arthur’s sock drawer. Black lace is a form of self-defense. I also have these very cool black socks with pink toes and heels; the pink doesn’t show when you wear them, but they show when you do laundry, thereby warning Arthur away. I have like four of those.

So what do gay couples do? Loads of wash full of boysocks. Do they just…share socks? I suppose you could, I mean, I’m not attached to my socks, I just want an adequate supply. Or maybe separate hampers and separate washloads.

Or one of them could wear femme socks.

24 comments

  1. Roberta says:

    I’m trying to remember… there might have been sock sharing.
    Although I seem to recall a difference in sock-folding/wrapping/rolling styles. This seems to be a real point of dissention within (among?) couples.

  2. Ken says:

    At one time it was easy… there were boy socks, man socks, and woman socks. But then the boy grew up into man socks, and the woman decided she like man socks better because they last longer, and suddenly there is confusion….. Especially because even if we do manage to get them properly seperated she will raid my drawer if none of her 47 pairs of socks pleases on any specific morning, as is the woman’s perogative……. and the boy will just as happily wear his white sweat socks with his black pants and black sneakers.

  3. deblipp says:

    Although I seem to recall a difference in sock-folding/wrapping/rolling styles. This seems to be a real point of dissention within (among?) couples.

    Within.

    Wow. Two marriages and I didn’t know that there was sock dissension. Vere yelled at me once about the way I folded and hung his jeans. Once. Thereafter his jeans were delivered unfolded.

  4. Ken says:

    When I lived with my parents my mother had a system for keeping my socks and my father’s separate – she sewed a small piece of colored thread into the top of the sock. My father was blue, I was red.

    That’s too much work for me……

  5. Roberta says:

    Apparently my frame of consistent reference includes OCD. I actually preemptively asked Joe how he want his tee shirts rolled and folded (he has a drawer designated to each) before touching anything of his.

  6. deblipp says:

    He has a drawer designated to each t-shirt? Or he has one drawer designated to “folded” and one to “rolled”?

    I am just a person who draws the line at being told how to fold laundry. I think I stopped folding Arthur’s when he was eleven. Here, son, is a basket of clean laundry which your loving mother lovingly washed for you. Fold it and put it away. DO NOT hover over ME telling me how to fold it right.

  7. Roberta says:

    “folded’ and “rolled”.

    I offered. I was at his house, laying around like a lump while he was doing chores. I offered. And when he said yes, I asked… asked, I tell youis there a particular way you want these folded?And I made him show me one.

    Why offer if A) it will irritate him or B) he will be irritated which will irritate me?

    I heart him.

    And Joe does not hover.

  8. deblipp says:

    You are a mad woman.

    And Joe does not hover.

    But your nephew does.

    Your tall nephew that is. I have seen no sign of insipiant hover in the BIG.

  9. Evn says:

    We share socks. And shirts. And t-shirts. And occasionally hats. No comment on underwear. TMI.

    As Jerry Seinfeld once noted, the best part about being in a gay relationship is that your wardrobe automatically doubles.

  10. deblipp says:

    As Jerry Seinfeld once noted, the best part about being in a gay relationship is that your wardrobe automatically doubles.

    If you’re the same size. Although with socks it doesn’t matter.

    And butch/femme lesbian couples don’t share much wardrobe, even if they are the same size.

  11. Evn says:

    We’re both butch. Lots of flannel. And three cats. Some of our friends refer to us as that nice lesbian couple.

  12. Pan says:

    Evn and the Greenman are lesbians. Though Evn is more the flannel open over white tee, and the Greenman is more the flannel buttoned down.

    When last in a relationship we had “his” “mine” and “our” clothing. Socks, in gerneral, counted as “our” socks save a few pair of really Brittish Prof looking brown socks that are mine. (Which he either got rid of, or the drier grimlin is taking entire pairs now).

  13. deblipp says:

    You know, this is the most fascinating conversation. When I dated a gay man and he’d talk about his past relationships, I realized that gay vacations are totally different, two guys doing guy stuff and whatever, there was much less of that compromising about what actually constitutes “vacation.” And it was a new way of thinking about how relationships might be conducted that I hadn’t considered.

    But shared clothes? “Ours” clothes? I’m stunned. Just…stunned.

  14. Pan says:

    Well, I mean, we it was mostly just tee-shirts and shorts and such. Nothing too personal. AND its nice when you’re in a pinch and need something clean. I’m sure that if you had sisters, you know how it goes.

  15. Roberta says:

    Sister, here! But she went nuts when I tried to get into any of her stuff, and then later we were vastly different sizes.

  16. Evn says:

    Though Evn is more the flannel open over white tee, and the Greenman is more the flannel buttoned down.

    You know, this sums up our relationship quite nicely…

  17. Ken says:

    Some T-shirts get folded and some get rolled? And there are different drawers for each method?

    Wife and I have different philosophies about folding… which I think are pretty much gender related. I hold the neck under my chin, flop the sides in, and fold it over so it’ll fit in the drawer. She lays it out on the bed, smooths all the wrinkles out, gets the micrometer to measure the sides…..

  18. deblipp says:

    But she went nuts when I tried to get into any of her stuff

    Because everything came back with holes in it.

    She lays it out on the bed, smooths all the wrinkles out, gets the micrometer to measure the sides…..

    That’s exactly like my first husband. That’s why I made him fold his own stuff.

  19. Ken says:

    That’s exactly like my first husband. That’s why I made him fold his own stuff.

    Did he adjust every hanging towel in the house too? It’s like Sleeping With The Enemy………

  20. deblipp says:

    No, but he ironed his jeans.

    Ironed.

    Jeans.

  21. Oh my. Straight men ironing. And ironing jeans on top of that. Mind-boggling.

    When I was in a relationship and living with another guy, we generally had different styles of socks, and pretty much kept clothing separate, even though we were roughly the same size. I think I mostly ended up doing the laundry. The division of labor and resources wasn’t exactly fair and just. (And that’s all I’m going to say about that.)

    I did end up with some of his T-shirts after he left.

  22. Ken says:

    I was going to comment about a friend who ironed his jeans….. Weird.

  23. Dolmena says:

    For a time I had a partner that was about the same size as myself– size 30 men’s jeans, and boy was that a long time ago! We had shered clothing. Nowadays anything not femme and really huge as opposed to merely big belongs to my partner. If the socks are butch, I measure.