Deborah Lipp

A while back, I promised techniques for brief meditation and brief prayer. If you’ve got a life overwhelmed by demands—small children, a noisy space with no room for quiet—than traditional meditation instructions that require twenty minutes of peace and quiet might seem laughable. But if you have such a life, you need the peace that meditation can bring even more than the rest of us.

First, work on grounding and centering. I mean, focus your meditation entirely on getting good at that, until you can do it in about five seconds. That’s easier than it sounds and it’s crucial for brief meditation.

The trick to the five-second grounding and centering is, first, to practice, and second, to leap in. Ground and center as if. As if you could do it in five seconds. Don’t say, well I’ll try, simply know you can; the resource is, truly, already within.

It is helpful to have a trigger; a crystal you hold, a picture you gaze at, a visualization you use. Imprint that trigger by using it whenever you ground and center; ultimately, simply using the trigger will start the process, as if you’ve pushed a button.

Once you have relaxed your mind and body into the centered moment, you can use that moment for prayer or meditation. Sometimes all you have time for is the centered moment, but even that can bring benefits to you.

The easiest place to find a meditation moment is in the shower. Even the most harried among us has to shower, and the relaxing feeling of hot water, the sound barrier as it rushes about us, is ideal for taking that deep breath in, finding your center, and remembering who you are. This is a moment when you can reach out to the Goddess, or ask for inner wisdom, or for strength. This is the moment when you can find the compassion that lives within you, and bring it to your day.

Another good moment for brief meditation is when you’re getting dressed. Instead of just throwing on whatever, take a moment to look at your closet or dresser and know that beauty is of the Gods, and bring beauty to yourself.

And again, when you open the refrigerator. Nourishment is the Earth Mother, it is the Harvest and the Hunt. Ground and center, and from a centered space, open the fridge and let the feeling of sustenance and satiety become a part of you.

If you can commit yourself to seeing the sacred in the ordinary, then there are many such moments you can find, and they will become a source of strength and peace for you.

Normally we do guided meditations on Sundays, but I have a different idea for Mother’s Day.

We are “guided” by media and marketing as to exactly what thoughts we’re supposed to have today. But our real thoughts are often more complex. We’re supposed to be loving and grateful and tender. But most of our mothers are not Hallmark mothers. Most, in fact, are human beings.

In thinking about our own mothers, we may indeed feel loving and grateful and tender. We may also feel grief and loss and rage. We may feel abandonment or neglect or longing. We are likely to feel a combination of things, only some of which would make a marketable greeting card.

I remember there was a day I was working out, and I was explaining how my mother could be both maddening and wonderful. The two women I was working out with were really interested in shutting me down, in criticizing me for airing negative thoughts. I was saying how, when my knee was broken, my mother would take me to my doctor’s appointment (because it’s pretty hard to drive in an immobilizer), but she would show up every time in her Mini-Cooper. And every time I would ask her to please bring the Camry instead, because it was a long, slow, painful process to wriggle my way into her tiny car in the immobilizer. But every time she came with the Mini-Cooper. And yet, every time, she came.

The women at the gym were angry with me for being exasperated, when my mom was so great to pick me up in the first place. And it’s surely true that there are plenty of people whose mothers live the same twelve miles away mine does, who’d have to take a cab. I did say she was wonderful and exasperating. Human. Not a Hallmark card. And that wasn’t okay with these ladies, who, it turned out, were grieving the loss of their mothers.

Grief. Exasperation. Love. Anxiety. Self-consciousness. Compassion. Frustration. These are all real feelings. We may have any or all of them. Or others.

I invite you, this Mother’s Day, to explore your honest feelings about your mother, and to permit yourself to have those feelings.

Today is my birthday (thank you, thank you). How you can screw up your birthday is through expectations and hopes that are not articulated or fulfilled. There’s a fantasy about being catered to; that it will be like when you’re a kid, and the entire world parts like the Red Sea with birthday greetings and people bringing you breakfast in bed and presents and kisses.

The world is not the Red Sea of birthday greetings.

So let’s take a moment to contemplate this expectation. There is within you some longing. Some desire to be acknowledged, to be treated with regard, to be loved. This is a good desire, normal, human, poignant and real. It is harmful only when nurtured as a resentment towards the world instead of as a feeling of self-regard that is projected outward.

Ground and center.

Imagine (or remember) being an infant. Imagine being held, nurtured, and cuddled. Imagine a space of infinite and unconditional love.

You are an infant and unconditionally loved.

Now visualize growing up, bit by bit. You are a toddler, and still loved. You are a child, and still loved. As you grow, you also grow in independence. You are cuddled less, and cared for less, but loved just as much. As you grow, visualize that love as a thing you hold within. Visualize that love as a warm, glowing place within you. It was put there in infancy, and there it remains, glowing and warming you. It is fueled by the love given to you by others, and also by the love you give to yourself.

Continue to grow up, and see that glowing love within.

Now see yourself as you are today, and see the warm, glowing ball of love within you, nurturing you, warming you, loving you. Others love you and you love yourself. Visualize the people who love you. See them coming to you, hugging you, kissing you on the cheek, shaking your hand—however they might express themselves. And see that warm glow responding, brightening, in response to the love all around you.

And now go within, and notice that you have the ability to brighten the ball of love by yourself. Look at it, and while looking, love yourself, and notice it glowing brighter and warmer. Praise yourself for the things you’ve done well, and see the brightness. Forgive yourself for small flaws, and notice the warmth. Kiss yourself on the cheek. Stroke your own shoulders. And feel how very loved you are.

And now let the glow shine out. Let it be a part of your aura. It surrounds you. Let yourself be in the world glowing with the aura of being loved. As you move through your day, you are loved. As you do your work, you are loved. Know that this glow is always a part of you.

Passover is a celebration of freedom. I have a few thoughts about today that are ripe meditation subjects.

First is the notion of freedom. Passover is primarily a holiday of political freedom; as we contemplate freedom from slavery, we are obligated to contemplate those who are not free. Wherever anyone is enslaved, we are taught, we ourselves are not free. We must meditate
upon those who suffer so we can understand their suffering, but meditation is not enough. We should be prepared to act.

There is also inner freedom. Passover is a time wherein we can contemplate that which enslaves us. What binds you? What are you stuck with? What are you slave to? What runs you? What conditions, habits, addictions, relationships, needs, and desires do you have that prevent you from being truly free?

Passover is also a descent and resurrection. This is a universal motif in religion and myth. A god or goddess or hero descends into hell, suffers trials, and is miraculously able to return from hell after a harrowing journey, to be reborn in a way that redeems his/her people.
This is true of the descent of Inanna, of the abduction of Persephone, of the descent of Hercules, of the Wiccan tale of the Descent of the Goddess into the Underworld, and of the death and resurrection of Jesus. The Jewish version is unique in that it is the entire Jewish
people who descend and are resurrected, and therefore it is the tribe of the Jews, not any one person, who embody the redemption of the Jewish people. Perhaps this is why Moses does not enter the Holy Land; because there cannot be a single Savior of the Jews (except the Messiah); the Jews must save themselves.

The Jews journey to Egypt in pride and success but are enslaved. Slavery, symbolically, is Hell. Through a series of miracles, the Jews are led out of slavery, and in their long and arduous journey they are reborn as a new people, newly monotheistic (after that little calf
business) and with a set of laws. Thus resurrected, they enter the land of Israel.

So, resurrection. That’s a big one. But more important is the journey into and out of hell. Our lives follow trajectories of darkness and light. We are going one place la la down the road. Then we are in some other place, and it is hell. What the fuck happened? Our lives are
utterly unrecognizable. Yet we continue to journey. We can resist or accept but there we are. In Wicca we are taught that embracing the darkness leads to transformation; that only when we embrace Death can we know Rebirth. So it is a good time to ask: What do you resist? What embrace do you refuse? Is that refusal preventing you from moving on?

May your resurrection be blessed, and may you be truly free.

Last week we talked about meditating while cleaning. This is good because you have to clean anyway, but there are activities that are inherently more peaceful and meditative, that can be used in a mindful way.

The activities I have in mind fall into two basic categories: Rhythmic and creative. Of course, some activities can be both.

Many meditations guide you to imagery or use objects that focus/unfocus the mind. By staring at a mandala or a candle flame, you engage the mind so that every little stray thought isn’t an agonizing distraction. At the same time, you let go of the mind.

It’s kind of like letting your dog run in a fenced yard; you don’t have to watch him every minute because it’s fenced, and you can do more interesting things while he’s running. A mandala, a breathing technique, an object of spiritual inquiry can be a fenced yard. While you are getting value out of a cognitive inquiry, you are also not thinking about all the unmeditative things that might occupy your mind.

A rhythmic activity might be drumming, dancing, weaving, spinning (on a spinning wheel), sewing, knitting, carving or sanding wood, stringing beads, etc.

A creative activity might be painting or drawing, carving, beading, sculpting, etc.

If you’re doing woodcarving, the part where you’re repetitively clearing the surface might be more rhythmic, the part where you’re actually creating a design is more creative. Similarly, designing a bead project might be highly creative, focusing on color, shape, and arrangement, while actually stringing the beads, once designed and laid out, is repetitive and rhythmic.

Your activity can be purposeful or simply an occupation conducive to meditation. Next week we’ll talk about purposes that work well with meditation.

Prepare your activity. Get out your beading, carving, or knitting supplies before you begin. Sit in your workspace with everything ready.

Ground and center.

Now simply begin, allow your mind to remain focused on the work, undistracted by stray thoughts. Bring yourself back to the moment, to the physical objects, the tactile and sensory experience of your creativity.

You can choose in advance if you will focus on the goal—the end product—or stay in the moment; this bead, this string, this drumbeat. Either way, bring yourself back to that thought process whenever you stray.

Some projects are completed in a single sitting, some are not. Having a long-term project might be a beautiful way to create meditative suggestibility—when you pick it up, it begins to induce trance. On the other hand, a one-shot project has a clear ending point, bringing you out of meditation as you finish. For example, with beading, tying the final knot and attaching the closure is a natural way to end meditation.

I often meditate while cleaning. Specifically, while cleaning my altar or while preparing my home for ritual. This is a focused meditation, clearing the mind and thinking about meaning while I clean.

So I was delighted to find this blog post about cleaning in a Zen context, that mentions meditating while cleaning.

I like to think of a Zen monk sweeping the floors of a temple when I sweep. It’s corny, maybe, but it really helps me focus on the sweeping, and it’s a form of meditation. In this way, I actually enjoy the cleaning, although I’d rather be writing to be honest.

I think she’s slipping here. The trick is to stay in the moment, and not engage with what you’d rather be doing. Be here now.

So, suppose I’m scrubbing the tub for a ritual bath. I hate scrubbing the tub. It makes my back ache, it’s physically awkward, and frankly it never resuls in the Clean Tub I’d like, just a clean tub, if you know what I mean. I want it to sparkle like it’s new and it doesn’t.

But here’s what I do. I center myself, and visual the bath I’ll be taking. I align myself with a ritual purpose. I am doing ritual, just as much as I will be when I’m in the bath. Now, you can just do that, visualize bathing as you scrub, visualize having ritual seated on the carpet while you vacuum, and so on.

But I add a cognitive component: As I scrub, I meditate on the meaning of cleanliness, or of this particular bath. What does it mean to be spiritually clean? As I clean the temple, vacuum the rug, wash the altar, I ask myself about the inner nature of the temple, of the altar. As I dust my private worship altar, I meditate on the relationship I have with that altar. What does it mean to clean the idol, to serve the deity in that way?

These are deep meditations that can take me on interesting journeys. I value them.

And while I will never love the dishpan hands, or scrubbing the tub, doing these meditations takes me far beyond what I’d “rather be” doing and allows me to be fully present for a spiritual task.