The conservative mouthpiece network has totally run out of things to say.
They can’t answer Clinton on substance, because the least amount of research proves him right.
So they spent the first couple of days criticizing his style, as so wonderfully parodied last night by Jon Stewart.
I guess that got old, though, because now they’re deeply concerned about Mr. Clinton’s socks. The fact that I am not kidding makes this even funnier. Way funnier.
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You Are Big Bird |
 Talented, smart, and friendly… you’re also one of the sanest people around. You are usually feeling: Happy. From riding a unicycle to writing poetry, you have plenty of hobbies to keep you busy. You are famous for: Being a friend to everyone. Even the grumpiest person gets along with you. How you life your life: Joyfully. “Super. Duper. Flooper.” |
| What Disney Ride Are You?
Jungle Cruise You’re boring, cheesy, and tame. You’re the jungle cruise!!
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| Click Here to Take This Quiz Brought to you by YouThink.com quizzes and personality tests. |
Which of you found me by searching on
movie intramuscular injection
You can see why I’d be curious.
Seems people found this blog by searching for:
Octopussy Sari
“just dripping”
crossdress fifties
“i did it all for the cookie”
Wicca is an initiatory lineaged
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Crossdress fifties? Huh.
Today’s funnest sentence ever:
Give a precise blow to the muzzle of the cow in the event of absolute need, is also darn fine.
Back in 1998 I visited Australia for a month (Queensland to be precise). We visited a zoo, and this particular zoo had all the pervy animals in the country all gathered together.
I still don’t like to talk about the sexual assault by the emu. I mean, I know it’s just a big bird, but it was a big bird that made inappropriate advances upon my person.
Then there was the horny kangaroo, who did not assault me, but chased the rooey ladies about the enclosure, as a result of which “horse” is no longer the word I think of to complete the phrase “hung like a…” Golly.
But I know my audience. You all want to hear about the lesbian peahen.
» Read more..
What to Expect When You’re Pre-expecting.
Hat tip to Feministing.
I offer the following Starwood 2006 quotes without comment:
“Get your sleeve out of my grog.”
“The Cosmopolitan in my crotch was also your fault!”
“You hardly ever see a bar full of pirates.”
“I’m not hiking all the way down to the Time Machine.”
“Don’t quote me on anything. My ass is really wet and I’m tired.”
“Giant sky-enflaming fireballs.”
“Thank God for that man in the boa!”
“I’m so tired of seeing penises.”
“Undies on the table are right out!”
“Help me adjust my loincloth.”
“I’m not speaking after sundown, I’m just making cat noises.”
“After enough Starwood, women in clothes look sexy.”
I don’t know if anyone else can crack themselves up the way I can. Personally, all I have to do is sing C is for Cookie. I can do this quietly, sotto voce, and I’m a goner. I keel over with the giggles. Out loud is just about devastating.
My Cookie Monster imitiation is very good. I can’t do many imitations: I got Cookie, Ernie, and Marvin the Martian, and that’s it. But my Cookie kicks some serious Muppet ass.
Anyway, I crack me up.
Also, I like doing coffee riffs. I’ve been coffee-seeking in my Cookie voice for like twenty years. “Coffee. Me. Wants. Coffee.” Okay, you kinda have to be there. So Friday I was singing C is for Coffee (that’s good enough for me OH! Coffee coffee coffee starts with C). Cracked myself up. Also I was doing the Flying Lizards (I want coffee! Oooh. Ooh ooh. That’s what I want. Ooh.)
In the past, I had a distinct fondness for Bow Wow Wow (I want coffee!). I didn’t actually do this one Friday, I didn’t even think of it until I started writing, but anyway, it’s in the repetoire.
Now, my ex thought I was perhaps too easily amused and used to make fun of me for cracking myself up.
So I will throw this open to the masses. How do you crack yourself up? Or, am I just weird?
